Seattle, WA 2009: Trent Ling enjoys some cloud cover in Seattle with children, Arianna and Isaiah. As has been obvious throughout their 13-15 years together, only the Bible provides the necessary answers that can rescue such a “no-clue” and “no-chance” parent. Fortunately, the Bible easily delivers the necessary truth, power, and understanding.
From Trent Ling:
Though many believe and/or peddle innumerable notions or principles about parenting, the one customarily missing ingredient on the front lines is a parent who also is an actual disciple of Jesus. Of course, being a disciple of Jesus in name only and not in tested reality, also miserably fails to deliver the victories contemplated by the Scriptures. You have to be a disciple for real, according to the Scriptures. Unfortunately and inexorably, almost everyone will gloss over the absence of this indispensable ingredient and needlessly wonder, “What happened?” as they parent away as best they can.
“Fathers, do not exasperate your children…” Ephesians 6:4. “Fathers, do not embitter your children, or they will become discouraged.” Colossians 3:21.
Parents who are not disciples cannot fake it when it comes to these verses. Such parents themselves are largely too harried, too harassed, too needy, too in want, too superficial, and too deluged by countless other spiritual deficits to stand up to these standards. Parenting is generally done on the cheap, and the by-product of exasperated, embittered, and discouraged children remains commonplace. Edicts from heaven dictate that no real and genuine relief attends the household devoid of a disciple.
“Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.” Proverbs 22:6.
It is impossible to train a child in the way he should go without the trainer following the “author of life.” Acts 3:15. This author vacancy renders everything a matter of trial and error, hoping for the best, human ideas, and dreadful gimmicks of always playing catch-up to ever-growing children. Inevitably, the children begin to search for answers on their own as more and more it becomes painfully obvious that mom and dad have no clue! Such is the normal course of events around the globe where Christ is not followed as intended, designed and offered.
“Do not believe me unless I do what my Father does.” John 10:37. “We all, like sheep, have gone astray; each of us has turned to his own way…” Isaiah 53:6.
Parents who are not really disciples of Jesus must constantly preach, holler, scream, and demand from their children the many things these parents themselves fail to deliver or practice. Such parents could never live up to the strict standard Jesus applied to himself in calling people not to believe him if he didn’t do what God did. Hypocritical parents brazenly require their people to do things right, even as those same parents have long ago given up on the idea when it comes to their own lives. There is no power in this, of course, and hypocrisy remains the only likely hand-me-down. Generally, everything breaks down, proving the prophet right that each (parent and child alike) has turned to his own way. There is no powerful example or demonstration; there is no authority wielded or deliverance granted or gotten. Without Christ leading the parents, all is ultimately little more than slapdash and flimflam–another mess for God to clean-up later.
In Christ, the situation receives ample funding. Enough humility, insight, heart, energy, and selflessness lubricate and facilitate the impossible call of parents actually raising their children. No doubt, the angels of children (Matthew 18:10) keep things from going over a cliff in most cases. However, where everlasting power and victory are close at hand in Christ, how can almost all settle for the bitter embers of hypocrisy and abuses of parental power?
Parenting books, seminars, magazines, and other advice vehicles never run in short supply. Desperate parents cannot figure out the maze; and profiteers cannot offer real resolving answers despite ringing cash registers. Neither this nor other forthcoming parenting letters present the entire bible on the subject at hand. The effort here is to spur you on toward searching out the deeper and wider truths the bible provides, gaining one impossible victory after another after another.
Start with this and master it before enrolling in “Parenting 201,” despite the hasty temptation to move onto the “good stuff.”
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